Goodbye (Again): Peeta's Perspective
by so-amazing-here
Summary: This is a series of Peeta POVs from Goodbye (Again). Modern AU.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: This story covers Peeta's POV on various events in my story Goodbye (Again). If you haven't read that story and are interested in learning more about what happens next, look at my profile for the link. It's written from Katniss's POV. If you have been reading Goodbye (Again), I hope you enjoy these glimpses into Peeta's thoughts and motivations!**

**Feel free to come say hi on tumblr (soamazinghere). Always accepting ideas for Peeta POVs you'd like to see.**

**Disclaimer: I own no part of the Hunger Games.**

* * *

_5:00pm_

"Man, it is _not_ looking good out there. Are you sure you want to do this?" Finnick asks me as we pull up to the airport drop-off.

Because of all the snow, the drive here took longer than we thought it would, but that's fine because my flight's already delayed. I'm not in any danger of missing it. I'm exhausted…I just want to get home already.

"Don't worry about me," I say, although what I'm seeing outside the car window is honestly making me nervous. There are so many people milling around – way more than there should be on a normal weekend and this isn't even a holiday. I can't tell if they're being dropped off or picked up.

And if anything, the snow looks to be coming down harder.

Annie twists around from her spot next to her husband in the front seat. "Peeta, are you sure? You can come home with us and wait this out," she suggests.

"Oh, I don't think it's _that_ bad," I scoff. "I'm sure I'll be fine, guys."

Finnick pulls his car to the curb and the three of us get out to say our goodbyes. "It was great seeing you," I say as I wrap my arms around Annie for a brief hug.

She squeezes me back. "Let's not let _three years_ pass between visits again, alright Peeta?" she teases.

I chuckle quietly. "Maybe you guys need to come to Chicago next time!"

"Sorry dude, but we all live here – you'll always be out-voted," responds Finnick as he claps me affectionately on the back.

"But seriously, just have a safe trip home," Annie adds, looking nervously at the sky.

I grab the handle of my suitcase and start to slowly make my way into the airport, waving back at my friends. "I will. Bye guys!"

The warm air hits me as soon as I step through the airport's doors, which is when I realize just how cold it is outside. I'm probably not going to get any relief going back to blustery Chicago, either.

I make my way to the counter for United Airlines and check in, thankful that my flight hasn't been cancelled. From the information I'm seeing on the departures board behind the counter, it looks like many other flights have been.

I walk through the airport, make my way through the security line, and find my gate. Everything looks good – the flight's still delayed, but I see a plane parked outside at the end of the jetway. If there's a plane, then we can take off and get out of here, right?

There's a disturbingly large number of people hanging around the gate area but I decide to ignore what that might imply. I'm just going to think positively and assume that my flight will leave as scheduled. I had such a great time with my friends this weekend – I'm not going to let anything ruin my good mood.

Like Annie said, it had been years since our whole group of college friends got together and I'm usually the one missing from the gatherings. They all live out here, most within a few hours' drive of the little town where we all went to school. I'm the only one who has to get on a plane and fly halfway across the country in order to meet up.

No one in the extended Mellark clan had ever gone so far away for college, but I guess I was feeling rebellious at the time I decided to come out here. We're used to being able to see each other whenever we want, so I took a lot of flak from my relatives for leaving. By the time high school had ended, I started to feel suffocated by the family and decided to get away.

So I chose a small liberal arts college in the mountains out west and majored in art, thinking that these choices would give me an identity of my own. But what I discovered – much to my shock – was that I actually _missed_ the big, crazy Mellark family. I _missed_ baking. So in the end, I took my art degree and moved back to Chicago. It's not what I'd necessarily planned on doing, but I'm happy.

This past weekend, a bunch of my college friends decided to rent a condo near one of our favorite ski resorts and I was finally able to afford the plane ticket to come see them. We partied all weekend, just like old times. But after all the skiing and all the drinking, I'm pretty sure I'm going to need another weekend to recover from this trip.

I settle onto the floor, lean against the wall and close my eyes. I'm just going to rest until they board the plane.

The sound of a printer spitting out paper breaks me out of my reverie. A gate agent rips it off and reads it, an exasperated look on her face. She picks up the phone and turns her back to me so I can't hear any of the conversation she's having, but eventually she sets down the receiver and sighs, turning to the agent beside her. "Another one," she says wearily. "I'm getting tired of being yelled at."

Okay, now I'm worried. My dread only increases as I see her reluctantly pick up the handset for the loudspeaker. "Ladies and gentlemen, if you are booked on flight 216 to Chicago O'Hare, we've just been informed that the flight has been cancelled."

A chorus of groans erupts around me.

The agent continues, "You can find a rebooking line in the center of the concourse. If you proceed there, they'll assist you with a new flight."

I let out a deep breath and drop my head into my hands. This is _just_ what I needed right now. And just look at how many people need new flights – there's no way I'm getting one soon. Pulling out my phone, I decide to call Finnick and see if I can stay with him and Annie while I wait this out. Better than being stuck in an airport.

I stand up and pace around the gate area while I make the call, which goes straight to voice mail. Either he's busy or my call isn't getting through, so I decide to leave a message just in case. "Hey Finn, it's Peeta. You guys were right, my flight got cancelled. Any chance I could crash at your place until I can get home? Let me know." I shake my head in frustration as I end the call.

I try Annie's phone, too but I can't reach her either. I don't bother with anyone else – they all live in other cities and are probably in the middle of their drives home by now.

Now what?

I glance down toward the center of the concourse. If _that_ is the rebooking line, there's no way I'm getting anywhere hear it. What I see is a chaotic mass of hundreds of angry-looking people attempting to reach the three airline employees working frantically at the counter. No thanks.

I'm just calling the airline. I can bypass all those sad people waiting in line and get this taken care of much more quickly. Calling the number I find online, I'm already feeling pretty good when the call actually goes through. First step complete.

They put me on hold after I press "6" to be connected to reservations. I expect this, so there's no problem.

I wait.

And wait.

And wait.

I sit down on the ground and nearly doze off when I finally hear a voice. "United Airlines reservations, how may I help you?"

My eyes abruptly snap open and I quickly explain my situation, trying to use my most charming and patient voice; I know I won't get anywhere by taking my annoyance out on the poor woman on the phone. She asks me to hold again while she checks on the available flights.

I've spent about 20 minutes or so trying to get through to the airline over the phone, but it looks like it's about to pay off. And I can tell from eyeing the rebooking line that I would still be nowhere near the counter if I had gone there. _Score._

I'm feeling pretty good about myself when I look at my phone and realize that I'm not on hold – the line's gone dead. _Seriously?_

I try to call back again and again, but now my calls aren't even going through. I grit my teeth and take a deep breath – looks like I don't have any other choice but to face the rebooking line.

* * *

_7:10pm_

I'm keeping myself entertained in line by watching the woman standing in front of me. I'm not sure if she realizes it, but every thought going through her head shows on her face and I find it completely mesmerizing. She shifts quickly from looking worried, to bored, to angry, to annoyed…never the least bit happy though. The most frequent expression I see on her face is a scowl.

She's also very attractive, which makes this people-watching exercise even more enjoyable. Her long, dark hair falls in waves down her back, and her eyes…well, honestly I'm having trouble getting a good look at them without being too obvious. They seem to be grey, which is fitting – there's something stormy behind them. Her skin is tan, but I'm not sure if that's because she's been on vacation recently or if that's her normal skin tone. Either way, I doubt she's spent her entire winter out in the mountains. Maybe she's not from around here.

She also doesn't seem particularly approachable. But I like a challenge, so I think I might just try to talk to her anyway.

Still, I hesitate. It's frustrating. I don't have trouble talking to anyone – in fact, I love meeting new people. And talking to someone new would be a great way to pass the time in this long line. So why can't I get up the nerve to approach her?

_Enough._ I need to stop over-thinking this.

Clearing my throat, I start with, "Excuse me."

No response. In fact, she turns her back to me and starts typing on her phone. Is she just rude or did she not hear me?

I try again. "Hello?"

Still nothing. She's completely ignoring me and I involuntarily let out a small laugh in disbelief. What is her _problem_?

I'm not sure why I haven't just given up at this point, but I suddenly find myself tapping her on the shoulder. She slowly turns around, glaring at me. For some reason though, I can't keep a smile off my face. There's something incredibly amusing about this situation. Then again, maybe I'm just tired.

"You were really off in your own world!" I tell her. "I've been trying to get your attention for a few minutes now." I wonder what she's going to say to that. Will she admit to blatantly ignoring me?

Nope, all I get from her is an annoyed-looking eye roll. I persist in talking to her anyway. "Do you think we're going to be stuck in the airport all night?" I ask.

Is that really the best thing I could think of to say? It doesn't matter anyway, I guess. This woman clearly doesn't want to be talking to me, or anyone. I refuse to entertain the thought that it might just be _me _she doesn't like.

But I don't stop talking to her.

And eventually I have a breakthrough. Even though she is clearly trying to ignore me, I can't resist making a comment when I see her fidgeting uncomfortably. She's purposely being obstinate when I suggest that she change her shoes. Once I finally convince her, she's so relieved that I actually hear her laugh. It's one of the most beautiful sounds I've ever heard.

We've been talking ever since. She' not the most verbose person I've ever met, but I'm finding it very rewarding just to get her to open up to me, even a little. I have a sense that she doesn't chat with strangers often, so I happily respond to her polite questions about my family and why I'm here.

Inexplicably, I find myself very interested to learn that she's here alone. Maybe I'll have the opportunity to get to know her better. Taking the fairly innocuous route, I ask, "What brings you to this airport? Or do you live here?"

She eyes me a bit suspiciously. (I've noticed she does that fairly often.) "I don't live here. I was just taking a trip with my sister," she responds.

"Your sister? I thought you said you were here by yourself," I say, surprised. It doesn't look like she knows any of the other people in line around us.

"I am," she replies quickly. "She already flew home."

"You weren't on the same flight?"

She shakes her head. "No, we were. Long story short, I ended up here and she's on her way home," she says. Lowering her head, she looks down at her feet and I see a small smile cross her face. Turning back to me, she says proudly, "She's graduating med school soon and she had an important interview for her residency tomorrow. So she had to get back."

I can't help but smile – hearing her talk about her sister has made her more animated than I've ever seen her. (Okay, so I've only known her for about thirty minutes, but still.) "She's lucky she made it back," I observe.

"I know," she responds, nodding vigorously. "I was _so_ worried she wouldn't. And then I would've felt guilty for convincing her to take this trip with me."

"Oh, so this was _your_ idea?" I tease her.

This gets another small laugh out of her. "Yes and no," she explains. "I was already coming for work; I just asked Prim to come because then we could take a trip and only pay for one plane ticket."

"Prim is your sister?"

"Oh, um, yes," she says, realizing that she hadn't mentioned her sister's name before. It dawns on me that she and I don't know each other's names either…I'm going to have to rectify that soon.

She continues, "Prim is going to be a pediatrician, and I just know –"

"Next, please!" shouts the agent at the rebooking counter. We've reached the front of the line. I didn't even realize it, I'd been so caught up in my conversation with…Damn, I have to ask her name!

But I don't get the chance. When she realizes she's at the front of the line, the woman abruptly stops telling me about her sister and rushes to the rebooking counter without so much as another word. I stare at her back but she doesn't look my way.

A few minutes later, I'm called to the counter as well. There are two other rebooking agents between me and the woman I'm watching intently, but I'm forced to turn to the counter if I want to get a ticket to go home.

"Hi, how are you?" I say, flashing the agent a smile. She ignores me and takes the boarding pass that I offer her. She begins typing into a computer in the counter in front of her.

But my attention is drifting away to the woman whose name I haven't caught - _yet_. She's still there, standing in front of the counter talking to another rebooking agent. I've got to catch her before she leaves.

"Mr. Mellark," the agent says, interrupting my thoughts. "I've got you on another flight to Chicago tomorrow at 2 o'clock. Here's your boarding pass." She hands me a piece of paper and points behind me. "Check those monitors tomorrow to find your gate. NEXT!" she yells, dismissing me quickly.

"Thanks," I say, stepping away from the counter to let the next person take my place. I glance at the spot three counters away where my attention had been focused for so long. An elderly couple is deep in conversation with the agent.

She's gone. Where did she go?

* * *

_8:15pm_

This may sound like a stupid, rash decision, but I decide to follow her. The only problem is, I don't know which way she went. Jogging out to the center of the concourse, I look to my left and right for any sign of her. But there are so many people around – the rebooking line has only gotten longer since I joined it – and it's going to be difficult to spot her.

I catch a lucky break as an airline employee drives a cart down the corridor, forcing the hordes of people to clear away from its path. Beyond the cart, through the clearing, I see her. Letting out a sigh of relief, I quickly make my way after her, nearly barreling into a group of high school students in the process.

But I don't stop – I continue forward, never letting my eyes leave her. If I knew her name, I definitely would've yelled it already, but I'm not going to just starting yelling "hey you!" in a crowded airport like a madman. _Not yet._

I'm getting closer to her when she turns suddenly into the restroom. Panting slightly, I slow down, not realizing how quickly I'd been moving to try and reach her. I station myself across the hallway, leaning against the wall and intently watching the restroom entrance. I'm going to wait.

As I stand staring at the restroom door, it dawns on me that this seems kind of…presumptuous (to put it mildly). What made me run after this woman – who, for the record, looked like she barely tolerated talking to me when we were in line – and follow her? What exactly am I planning to do when she comes out?

This could be a very bad idea. She'll probably think I'm some kind of stalker.

My friends could confirm my history of being too…forward with women. _Not _in a stalker way, just in a "wearing my heart on my sleeve" kind of way. I have a really hard time hiding how I feel and sometimes that can scare women away. I definitely _don't_ fall in love with every woman that comes my way – in fact, I don't think I've ever even _been_ in love – but I develop crushes, attachments, or whatever you want to call them, fairly quickly. And I'm not afraid to say how I feel. Life's too short.

My family, on the other hand, feels the exact opposite of my friends. It's the Mellark way to be outgoing and say what you think. There may have been a lot of broken hearts in the ancestral tree, but not for a lack of trying.

Obviously none of my relationships have ever turned into anything – I'm still single. In fact, it's been over a year since I've even had a serious girlfriend.

I've been trying to take what my friends have said to heart and hold back a little when it comes to expressing my feelings so openly. So what am I doing following this nameless woman through the airport like some kind of fool? This is definitely _not_ holding back.

I need to take a step back and think about what I'm doing. The problem is, I don't really have time to think. If I want to talk to this woman, this is my _only_ chance. I don't know why I feel so compelled to seek her out, but I've been following my instincts up to this point.

And really, is it so horrible for me to seek her out, given the situation? We're both stuck and alone in the airport. It'll be a boring night all by myself. Some companionship would be nice, and there doesn't have to be anything more attached to it; just two people hanging out and passing the time.

But I know that's not entirely true. I definitely feel attracted to her. I could go talk to her – and do what, exactly? Explain that I _followed her_ to the restroom? Ask her name? Ask her to dinner? Ask her to _spend the night with me_? How do I not come off like a stalker? Or at the very least, how do I not make it obvious, under the circumstances, that I'm interested in her? Surely she'd see right through me.

I've just about convinced myself to leave, to walk away and never look back, when I see her leave the restroom. At least, I'm pretty sure it's her. She's walking away from me, so all I see is her back. This woman has her hair in a braid and she's wearing different clothes but she has the same suitcase and backpack. It's definitely her.

I freeze.

I was ready to leave, but _I can't_. In that instant, every rational thought in my head flies out and I hurry after her.

* * *

_8:35pm_

I can't quite believe it but somehow I've ended up here, planning to spend my entire evening with her. With _Katniss_.

After running behind her down the corridor, grabbing her, and scaring her badly enough that she dropped her suitcase, I hurriedly recovered and spoke to her. I don't remember anything I said and I probably made a fool of myself, but it doesn't matter. Now I know her name, she knows mine, and we've agreed to spend the rest of our time stuck here…together.

I've walked a few feet away from Katniss to check the messages on my phone. She's partially turned away from me as she kneels on the floor, looking for something in her backpack. I take the opportunity to stare at her openly.

Since I first met her in the line, she's changed from a professional-looking pantsuit into…well, I think she's wearing pajamas. She looks so much more comfortable than before. More natural, less stiff. Incredibly attractive without even trying. _Slow down, Mellark._

I bite my lip to keep from smiling like a fool. Turning my attention back to my phone, I see a couple of calls and texts from Finnick. I immediately read his most recent message.

"_Peeta! Got your message! Of course you can stay with us_ – _it's snowing pretty hard out there, but give me a call and we'll figure out a way to get you back to our place. We're at home now_ – _it's about 8 o'clock._"

I tap my foot thoughtfully and look between my phone and Katniss. When I called him before, staying at the airport for the night seemed like a pretty unpleasant prospect, but now…well, I feel differently. If I go, I'd be leaving Katniss behind. I'd invite her to Finnick and Annie's house with me, but I know she'd never accept. We barely know each other.

Is Katniss worth spending a night on the airport floor? I honestly don't know, but I won't have any other chances to find out, either.

I start typing. "_Don't worry about it_. _I don't want you guys driving in this weather. I'll be fine_ – _I've got another flight booked and I want to wait here to catch it._" I'm not going to specifically mention that my flight isn't until tomorrow afternoon. And I'm certainly not going to mention Katniss.

Finnick responds quickly. "_Are you sure? I've driven in worse._"

"_Yep, I'm all set here. I'll let you know when I make it home._"

Slipping my phone back into my pocket, I walk toward Katniss but stop suddenly when I see her staring at me. She explains that she's hungry, but when I suggest we go find some food, she doesn't seem to want to leave the spot we've claimed. She's almost _whining_ – it's kind of adorable. Eventually she relents when I offer to go check out what's available for us to eat and report back. Besides, it gives me an idea.

I pull out my phone and hand it to Katniss. She looks at me, confused. "Here. Put your number in my contacts so we can find each other if we get separated," I explain. She quickly complies _and_ asks me to do the same for her.

I leave soon after that, feeling pretty pleased with myself. I got her phone number! Not sure what I'm going to do with it exactly, but now I have some way of maintaining contact with her in the future. If that's what I want to do.

I walk up and down the airport concourse checking out our options. Katniss was worried that everything would be so busy that we'd give up our space on the floor for nothing. But from what I can see, we should be able to get a table anywhere we want. There aren't any great food options available, but what do you expect from an airport?

When I finally make my way back to Katniss, she so wrapped up in reading a _People_ magazine that she doesn't notice me until I crouch down right in front of her. I report to her what I found and we decide to go to Chili's Too.

As we make our way together down the corridor, I can't resist teasing her a little. "So…Lady GaGa, huh?" I say, raising my eyebrows.

"What?" she asks.

"You were _enthralled_ with some article about Lady GaGa when I came back just a minute ago," I reply.

She blushes. "For the record, it's my sister's magazine," she huffs. "But I guess if we were to get technical, I _am_ kind of a GaGa fan," she admits reluctantly.

"That's cool, I just would never have guessed it." She seems flustered, which wasn't my intention, so I try to put her at ease.

My words seem to relax her a little. "I've been to see her in concert three times. Honestly, I've never had so much fun at an arena show," she says shyly, glancing at me out of the corner of her eye.

Then she leans toward me and gives me a nudge. I turn to her in surprise. "Okay, now you tell me something embarrassing about yourself," she prods.

I shake my head. "No way. What you told me wasn't even a tiny bit embarrassing."

"It was to me!" she laughs, a hint of a blush still staining her cheeks. "You'll make me feel better if you level the playing field," she insists.

She gets me with the guilt card. "Alright…let me think," I say, biting my lip and narrowing my eyes in thought. A few seconds pass. "I've got something! I used to be a _huge_ fan of 'Saved by the Bell'."

Katniss's eyes light up as she laughs. "_That's_ what I was looking for!"

Her laughter is infectious and I find myself joining her. "I actually think I cried when Kelly and Zack broke up. Damn, I'd forgotten all about that!" I tell her.

Katniss smiles widely at me as we continue walking. "I feel so much better now. Thank you," she says. "You have to be pretty secure in yourself to make a confession like that," she teases.

In that moment, I find myself really wanting to touch her, and I almost reach out to put an arm around her but I stop myself just in time. I give her an awkward pat on the shoulder instead. She looks at me a little strangely but doesn't comment.

Just then we reach the restaurant and any slight awkwardness of the last moment dissipates as the hostess leads us to a table. I steal a glance at her out of the corner of my eye, but I don't think she notices. I wonder if she has any idea that she's actually made me _happy_ to be stuck in an airport?

* * *

_10:40pm_

I'm staring again.

We finish our dinner and wander the airport concourse, looking for somewhere to sleep. After finding ourselves a suitable piece of floor, we're both making an attempt to arrange our bags and clothes into some semblance of a bed.

I'm resting my head on the crumpled-up jacket that I've fashioned into a pillow when Katniss takes her hair out of her braid and starts running her fingers through it. It's such a simple gesture but she clearly has no idea how she's affecting me. In fact, she's not paying any attention to me at all as she does it.

But I'm absolutely mesmerized. I ball my hands into fists and fight the incredible urge I have to reach out and touch her hair myself. I wonder if it's as soft as it looks. Thank god she's so caught up in arranging her bags that she hasn't noticed the idiotic look on my face.

A small part of me realizes that I'm having too many feelings for this woman. It's like everything my friends have warned me about – about getting interested too quickly – times a million. It's probably because of the situation we're in – both stuck together, forced out of necessity to spend a lot of time getting to know each other…even _sleeping_ next to each other just hours after we met.

And Katniss hasn't been one to share many details about her personal life either, so I can't really say that I _know_ her. I've learned a few details – like the fact that she has a sister, that she was here on a business trip, even a little about her job – but I don't really know _Katniss_. I just have a collection of random facts about her.

And one of those random facts should be stopping me in my tracks: the fact that she told me she lives in Washington, DC. Which is hundreds of miles from my home. So even if I was _interested_ in her, what could I do about it? I've never done the long-distance thing before.

And there I go, getting way ahead of myself again. I'm contemplating long-distance relationships with a woman I have known for…how long? I glance down at my watch. Less than four hours! Get a grip, Peeta.

There are also some other very important details that I don't know about Katniss's life. For example, is there a boyfriend? She could be married for all I know.

After all, nothing about the way she's acted toward me during the time I've known her suggests that she likes me. At least, not as anything more than a casual acquaintance suitable for passing time in an airport. She _has_ to have a boyfriend – how can she not?

How can I find out?

I guess I just need to ask her, but I need to be smooth about it. Not obvious. Maybe get her to talk about something that will force her to mention whether or not she has a boyfriend. I bite my lip and stare at the ceiling thoughtfully.

Katniss lies down near me and starts whispering to me. I barely pay attention but instead blurt out the first question that comes to mind. "Do you need to call and check in with anyone? Like your sister…or your boyfriend?" I ask.

I cringe inwardly as the words leave my mouth. Oh god. Absolutely everything about that question made my intentions completely obvious. I brace myself and wait for her to call me out.

But instead of getting angry with me, she answers me. She even seems to think I asked her the question because I was looking for an excuse to call my girlfriend. I make sure to let Katniss know that I don't have one.

I also have a little mental celebration when I find out she doesn't have a boyfriend. Maybe things aren't so hopeless after all.

Impulsively, I grab her hand as I wish her a good night. I've wanted to find an excuse to touch her all night long and something just came over me when I learned she was single. It's like I can't control myself.

She doesn't react badly though – she just smiles as she closes her eyes and wishes me a good night in return.

* * *

_2:00am_

The next time I open my eyes, it's dark and eerily quiet in the airport. As I roll over onto my side to try to find a comfortable position and go back to sleep, I see Katniss's bag. But she's not lying on it.

I'm alarmed, but only for a second as I crane my neck and see her kneeling near the windows. Sitting up, I attempt to blink the sleep out of my eyes. "Katniss?" I say, trying to get her attention.

She tries to convince me to go back to sleep but I ignore her and move closer, rubbing her back reassuringly. If she's having trouble sleeping, I'm not going to sit back and do nothing. I might not be able to help her, but at the very least, I can keep her company.

We whisper quietly back and forth for a few minutes, me asking her how I can help while she turns down every offer I make, insisting that I do nothing. Finally I tell her that I can't go back to sleep, just to try to end her persistent attempts to force me to lie back down.

She seems exhausted. I'm not sure she's thinking clearly so I decide to stop asking her questions and just _do_ _something_.

I look around our little floor space until an idea hits me. Grabbing the jacket that I had been using as a pillow, I scoot myself until I'm leaning with my back against the wall. Not the most comfortable position, but I'm doing this for her, not me. "Come here," I tell her.

She gives me a suspicious look and doesn't move. I'm sure she thinks I'm trying to take advantage of her. I'm not, although I'll admit that the idea of having her sleep while she leans on me has its appeal. I'm just hoping that I can make her comfortable and help her actually get some sleep.

Katniss is tired enough that she eventually gives in and rests against my chest as I wrap my jacket around us to keep warm. Once she closes her eyes, I tentatively place my arms around her. I guess I don't really have to do that…but selfishly, I want to. She doesn't tell me not to. In fact, I might be imagining this, but I think she moves even closer.

I breathe deeply and try to calm my rapidly beating heart at the incredible sensation of having her so close to me. Having her in my arms feels so…right. I thought I'd be uncomfortable sitting on the cold floor and leaning against the wall, but I'm completely focused on the feeling of her.

My hand moves to her hair without me consciously choosing to do so. It relaxes me to just sit here, slowly stroking the dark strands and feeling them between my fingers. I think it's relaxing her, too. I hear her breathing start to slow down and even out. Peeking down, Katniss's face looks so calm and peaceful – I think she might be asleep.

I smile to myself and close my eyes as I let my head rest back against the wall behind me. There's nowhere else in the world I'd rather be.

* * *

_5:35am_

My back hurts and there's some sort of weight on my chest. It's still completely dark around me and I have no idea whether it's night or morning. I arch my back and try to wiggle away from the weight pinning me to the wall, but when I open my eyes I suddenly remember where I am.

The airport. _Katniss_.

Realizing that she's still asleep, I abruptly still my movements. I don't want to wake her; she looks just as peaceful as she did last night. I feel a little guilty watching her sleep, like I'm intruding on something private that I don't have permission to see. But I look anyway.

Sometime during the night our hands intertwined. I don't know or care whether it was her or me who reached for the other. I relish the feeling of her hand in mine while I can because I'm sure she'll let go as soon as she's awake.

I vow to remain still and quiet until Katniss wakes up, so I close my eyes and breathe steadily, focusing on feeling her comforting warmth in my arms. I'm desperately trying to make this moment last as long as it possibly can.

She starts to stir as soon as the airport lights flicker back on. It must be morning. I'm not sure if the snow is still falling, but I would guess not because I can see airline employees beginning to staff several nearby gates. Presumably flights will be taking off soon.

It suddenly occurs to me that I have no idea when Katniss's flight leaves. Meaning that I have no idea how much more time I have with her. The thought is unsettling.

As Katniss wakes up fully, she moves herself out of my arms and apologizes for sleeping on me last night. She has no idea. I might be a little stiff and sore this morning, but it was more than worth it to have the opportunity to hold her just once. I want to tell her that, and let her know exactly how comforting her presence was, and how beautiful she looked while she slept. But all I do is reassure her that I slept well – there's nothing else I can say that wouldn't sound completely ridiculous and sentimental. I'm keeping my mouth shut.

The sun is rising over the horizon outside, and I can see that the snow has indeed stopped. I point this out to Katniss because I think it'll make her feel better; I just hope she doesn't hear the sadness in my voice as I speak. Our hours together are definitely numbered. My flight leaves at two o'clock, so we have at most, eight more hours together.

"When's your flight? I don't think you ever told me." I say this rather suddenly and hope she doesn't catch the concern in my voice.

"Noon," she responds.

Noon? _Fantastic_. That cuts two hours off of the short time we have left. I find myself fighting back a feeling of panic and desperation that's building in my gut. I'm at a loss about what to do, if anything.

Do I try to talk to her? And if so, about what? I know without a shadow of a doubt that making some grand confession of my feelings would just result in her running off. She seems fairly reserved and besides that, I'm 100% certain she doesn't feel the same way about me so I would accomplish nothing beyond alienating her. And ruining – or wasting – the last few hours we have together.

Instead, I plaster a fake smile on my face and invite her to get some breakfast with me. Thankfully, my inner turmoil seems to go unnoticed as she grabs her bag and walks alongside me. For once, we walk in silence rather than with the easy conversation that we've enjoyed since we first met.

I'm frantically trying to figure out how to make the most of what little time we have. I just wish I knew what she was thinking – then I might know whether all this worry is even worth it.

* * *

_8:30am_

Katniss and I are walking briskly to gate A12. My name was called over the intercom and I was asked to report there. If I wasn't already nervous at hearing my name called, I am now as we approach the gate and I can clearly see on the monitor that a flight to Chicago is leaving in fifteen minutes.

But my flight's not until two o'clock – they can't want me on this flight, right?

My worst fears are confirmed as the gate agent unceremoniously hands me a boarding pass and asks me to quickly board the plane. I feel the blood drain from my face. I don't really have any choice.

This is it. The end of my time with Katniss. I'm not ready.

I think – no, I _know_ – that shock is painted all over my face as I trudge back to where Katniss is standing off to the side of the counter. She has a strange look on her face as well, but whether she's reacting to my outward display of emotions or something else, I'm not really sure.

I can't speak. I don't know what to do.

Twelve hours ago, if someone would've handed me a ticket for this flight, I would've taken it and felt like I won the lottery. Anything to get home a few hours earlier and get out of the airport sooner. Instead, I feel…empty, hollow…like I've lost something that I didn't even know I had.

Part of me wants to just go ahead and blurt out to Katniss what I'm feeling, even though I know she can't say it back. After all, I'll never have this chance again. But I _know_ that's the wrong thing to do, so I keep quiet. I don't want us to part on an uncomfortable note.

Besides, now she's smiling brightly at me and telling me to get on the plane. She looks _happy_ for me. To her, this is the natural endpoint of our impromptu airport friendship – finally getting to go home. Back to the people who matter.

I still want to tell her something. Maybe let her know how much I enjoyed spending time with her, or joke that I'm happy she was able to tolerate me, or suggest getting in touch again. I struggle to find the right words. "Um…Katniss…"

Before I can finish my thought, the gate agent tells me that I need to board the plane. I briefly notice a stricken look come over Katniss's face, but it's gone before I can even be sure it was ever there.

Suddenly I'm taken off guard by Katniss darting forward and wrapping her arms around my waist. I don't hesitate to return her embrace as tightly as I can, but before I know it she's already letting go and backing away.

I reluctantly walk over and hand my boarding pass to the gate agent, preparing to get on the plane. I steal one last glance over my shoulder at Katniss. She has her back to me and it seems like she's already starting to leave. She doesn't look my way, so I walk down the jetway onto the plane.

I wish I could've had a little more time with her, but I know that wouldn't have changed anything in the end. At least I didn't make a fool out of myself by saying something to her that I'd regret later.

We had our moment together, and now it's over. It has to be, for my sake. To invest time in a girl – however amazing I may think she is – who lives halfway across the country would be ridiculous. We're heading in different directions. She's walking away. I have to do the same, even if my impulsive heart is telling me not to.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: This chapter covers Peeta's POV on various events in Chapter 2 of Goodbye (Again). The link to that story is in my profile if you don't have it.**

**Thanks, as always, to sunfishdunes for her fabulous beta skills!**

**Come say hi on tumblr (soamazinghere).**

* * *

Making my way onto the airplane, I find my seat and settle into it heavily. Without even thinking, I find myself peering out the window trying in vain to catch one last glimpse of her through the airport windows.

Of course I don't see her. Katniss is probably long gone by now. She left before I even got on the plane. She didn't even look back at me.

That's not surprising though. What was I expecting, really? For her to come running after me begging me to stay with her? Of course not. We're both just trying to get home, after all.

I can't deny, though, that I felt some kind of inexplicable connection with her. It was unlike anything I've experienced before, but I don't know what it meant. Part of me thinks there really was something—I don't know, _special_—between the two of us.

That I'm even entertaining the thought of there being something special between me and a woman I only briefly met makes me cringe. More likely, whatever connection I felt was just the result of the extreme, out-of-the-ordinary situation we found ourselves in. How often have I ever spent that much alone time with a virtual stranger? That would be _never_.

And I have to remember that whatever connection I may have felt, she obviously didn't feel the same. She was friendly and pleasant toward me, but really nothing more. Maybe we'd be _friends_ if we both lived in Chicago. But I doubt it would be anything more, given how uninterested she seemed.

I review our entire time together in my mind, and I can't think of anything that would make me believe that she felt anything for me. I practically had to force her to talk to me in the first place. I followed her and asked her to hang out with me. She did allow herself to lean on me while she slept, but when I woke up she was trying to wiggle away. And then she wrapped up the whole experience by practically pushing me onto the airplane just a few minutes ago.

Yep, nothing.

As the plane takes off, I quickly glance at my watch. In a couple of hours, I'll be back in Chicago and back to reality. This snowstorm, the airport delay, meeting Katniss – none of it seems real. Getting home will help me get back to normal. This experience has left me feeling discombobulated.

When the flight attendant comes around with the drink tray, I take a cup of water and gulp it down quickly. Settling back into my seat and closing my eyes, I attempt to make up for some of last night's uncomfortable sleep.

But that isn't a good idea, because I can't shut off the thoughts running through my head. Thoughts of the numerous ways I made a fool of myself in front of Katniss. The memories rush through my brain even though I try to close them off.

_I followed her to the airport bathroom and waited for her outside._

_I used the world's lamest excuse to get her phone number._

_I practically came right out and asked her if she had a boyfriend._

_I coerced her into sleeping on me, and I stared at her while she slept._

Okay, this is really getting embarrassing. Just _remembering_ this is embarrassing. I was way too forward with her – almost creepy, I think. Why didn't she run away from me right off the bat? Maybe she was just being polite. Then again, she didn't strike me as the most congenial person on the planet.

I shake my head and try to distract myself. First with the Skymall catalog, then a book, then my iPod – but nothing works. Even making conversation with someone would be nice, but my seatmate is sound asleep. Wish that was me.

I sigh and stare out the window. It seems like I won't be able to escape these thoughts of Katniss today. This whole situation has me wishing I just listened to my friends when they told me not to be so forward and obvious with my feelings. Then maybe I wouldn't be feeling this way now.

It bothers me to realize how sad and regretful I'm feeling just knowing I'll never see Katniss again, especially given that she doesn't reciprocate my feelings. I shouldn't be letting her affect me like this. This is why I end up hurt so often – I let my emotions get the better of me and start feeling too much, too soon.

If only I hadn't been forced onto this early flight, then maybe Katniss and I could have had some closure to our little airport relationship. We could have really said goodbye to each other and I would've been absolutely certain that there was nothing more; that she had no feelings for me. Knowing that would have made leaving so much easier.

Now I'll always wonder. Unless I can figure out how to make myself forget her.

Realistically, I know that without the ability to see her or contact her, I'll probably forget about her slowly over time. It's not possible to sustain these feelings out of thin air. I take a little comfort in that, at least.

As my plane lands in Chicago, I remember one important detail: I have her phone number. As long as I have it, I could _technically_ contact her anytime. That throws a wrench into my whole "forgetting Katniss" plan.

I pull my phone from my pocket and turn it on, flipping through the contacts until I find hers. _Katniss_. I smile to myself as I realize that she only gave me her first name. That seems typical of the woman I met – giving out as little information about herself as possible.

So the question now is, do I want to contact her again or do I want to let her go? Given the numerous obstacles to pursuing her, I gather my courage and make the only decision that seems to make sense.

With a push of a button, I delete her contact information from my phone. And just like that, she's gone.

* * *

My phone's message tone goes off as I'm lounging at home in front of the TV. For a brief moment, my heart leaps as I consider that it might be Katniss.

Quickly grabbing my phone, my hopes are dashed as I see Finnick's name on the screen.

"_Dude, where are you? You're not still stuck at the airport?_"

Crap. I forgot to let him know that I made it home. Thinking about other things, I suppose. I type a brief response. "_Made it home a few hours ago. Sorry - forgot to let you know._"

"_Glad to hear it. Annie was about to have me send a search party._"

I smile to myself at her worry. That's typical Annie. "_Tell her I'm fine_."

"_Sorry for that whole fiasco, man. It'll probably be years before you come visit again_," Finnick replies.

Trying to reassure him, I type, "_It wasn't so bad. I had some company to help pass the time._"

Another text comes quickly and I groan to myself. "_Company…of a female variety?_" I can practically see him winking. Apparently I revealed too much.

I chew my lip, trying to decide how to answer him. I try to be honest but nonchalant, and put an end to this conversation. "_Yes. But I'm back home now, so no worries. I'll be in touch._"

My phone rings almost immediately after I send the text. It's Finnick, of course. I reluctantly answer. "There's nothing to talk about, Finnick," I tell him emphatically.

"What?" he says innocently, but presses on without so much as a pause. "Who's this lady?"

"No one," I respond, shaking my head. "She and I just hung out since we were both stuck."

Finnick is uncharacteristically silent for a few seconds before continuing. "So, you just got home a few hours ago?"

"Yeah."

"You told me and Annie not to come get you at the airport _last night_. And your flight wasn't until this morning?" he asks suspiciously.

Since when did Finnick get so perceptive? I'm going to have to figure out a way to deflect this. "I…didn't want to miss my flight," I reply unconvincingly.

"This girl had nothing to do with it?"

I'm silent.

"Damn, Peeta! Who's this girl, and what happened?" he asks.

"Nothing happened," I answer honestly. "We just hung out and talked…there's not much to do when you're stuck in an airport," I huff.

"You like her." He's not asking – Finnick states this as a fact.

"Maybe," I shrug.

"Did you at least make the most of your airport time?" he asks suggestively.

I groan. "I don't even want to know what you're thinking, Finn. Besides, she doesn't live in Chicago," I add.

"That wouldn't have stopped me," he responds. I can faintly hear Annie protesting in the background. "_Before_ Annie, of course."

"Well, you'll be happy to know that I decided not to make a fool of myself for once." I might have made that decision too late, though. "I'm moving on."

"Now, hold on a second, man. First, I was never on that bandwagon that thought you were too forward with the ladies. You go after what you want, I like that." He pauses a moment before continuing. "But more importantly – we were all just trying to warn you off girls we knew! You had a talent for making, um…unfortunate choices," he says.

"Whatever you say, Finn," I respond, rolling my eyes.

"Listen, your track record speaks for itself, dude." Okay, I'll give him that much. He kind of has a point there. "Anyway, back to this girl – what's her name, again?"

"Katniss."

"_Katniss_. If you like her, go after her. If I know you, you'll regret it if you don't," he tells me.

"It's a little late for that! I deleted all her contact info," I explain.

"What kind of idiotic move was that?" Finnick exclaims disbelievingly.

I let out a loud, exasperated sigh. "I was thinking of what you guys would say when I did it! Like you _just reminded me_, my track record with women is less than stellar."

"Don't try to dump your insecurities on me, man," Finnick protests. "You're a big boy. You can make decisions for yourself."

I rub a hand over my face as I get up from the couch, pacing around the room. "You're right…you're right. Sorry man. I guess I'm just questioning myself."

"Well, live and learn, dude. Plenty of fish in the sea, you know?" Finnick tries to reassure me.

"You're full of wisdom tonight, aren't you?" I joke, trying to lighten the mood.

After Finnick and I say our goodbyes, I'm left with an overwhelming feeling of regret. It's not that I feel certain that I should have contacted Katniss, but I feel like a complete ass for deleting her phone number. It means that I don't even get to make a choice.

Well, that's not entirely true. _I_ made the choice to get rid of her number, so whatever I feel now, it's my own doing. I'll just have to live with it.

* * *

This isn't really how I wanted to be spending my first morning back home after the whole airport thing, but I should've known I wouldn't be able to avoid it. I'm back to work at the bakery today, rehashing the entire fiasco for my dad and my brothers.

Including meeting Katniss. I'd never be able to keep it from them anyway – they know me too well. They'd grill me until they figured out what I was hiding. So best to just get it out there in the open.

"So when are you going to call her, Peeta?" asks Ryan. He takes a large ball of dough from the mixer and divides it in two, giving me half. I begin shaping it into several smaller loaves of bread, as he does the same.

"I'm not," I admit reluctantly. They're never going to let me live this down. "I deleted her contact information from my phone."

"WHAT?" my brothers shout in unison. And Hugh isn't even in the room with us – he's out front dealing with the display cases. Dad just shakes his head as he continues working on a wedding cake.

"Calm down, boys," Dad tells them. "I'm sure Peeta had a good reason for doing that." But he gives me a pointed look that lets me know he has his doubts.

"Nope," I say flatly. "It was stupid, but I can't change it now."

Hugh barrels through the doors to the kitchen, throwing several empty trays onto the counter. He walks over to where my phone is usually resting – near the bakery's computer – and grabs it. "Come on, Peeta," he says, scrolling quickly through the contacts. "There has to be a way to recover it."

I walk over and wrestle the phone out of his grip. "Hugh, you don't know what you're talking about." And…I may have already tried that. Not that he needs to know. It seems that what I did was permanent. Just my luck.

"Yeah, honestly Hugh, that's not going to work," Ryan calls from the sink as he washes his hands. "We're not tech people, how would we do something like that?"

I nod vigorously. "Thanks Ry." At least _someone's_ on my side.

"I've got ya, Peeta," Ryan says, winking at me as he walks to the computer and turns it on. "The better way to find her is to Google her with all the info you've got. So what do you know about her?" he says, turning to me expectantly.

I look between my brothers, too shocked to respond, as I hear Dad chucking behind me.

"No…just…no, you guys," I stammer out.

"He said her name's Katniss and she lives in Washington DC," Hugh pipes up helpfully, peering over Ryan's shoulder.

Ryan begins typing but then stops abruptly. "How do you spell Katniss?"

"Peeta? Just tell us," Hugh demands.

"Why, so you can stalk her for me?" I ask.

"No, so we can help you grow a pair and go track her down," Hugh says.

Ryan nods. "You've got to go for it, Peeta."

"No, I don't," I say obstinately.

"Listen, just tell us how to spell her name and then go over there and frost cookies or something. We won't even tell you what we find. We're just curious." Ryan says.

I grit my teeth. They're not going to let his go. "K-A-T-N-I-S-S. And I actually don't know anything else about her anyway," I admit.

Hugh gives me an incredulous look. "You were stuck together for what, twelve hours, and you don't know anything else about her? What were you talking about the whole time?"

I glare at him, shaking my head. "It doesn't matter! And we were sleeping for at least half that time," I retort.

"You're sure you don't know her last name?" Ryan asks, turning briefly away from the computer.

"How would I know it if she didn't tell me?"

As Hugh and Ryan huddle around the computer, trying to track down Katniss online, I stomp to the opposite end of the kitchen. Dad walks up behind me and places his hand gently on my shoulder.

"You alright, Peeta?" he asks quietly.

"I just wish they'd leave this alone," I tell him. "I made a mistake, but they don't have to try to fix it."

"They mean well, Peeta. Just let them do what they want, and don't let it change your mind," he says. "As long as you're sure about this. Are you?"

I hesitate a moment. "Pretty sure," I finally answer him, nodding slowly.

Dad gives me a slightly skeptical look but leaves to get some bread out of the ovens. I turn my attention back to the cookies in front of me, preparing them to go into the display out front. My attention wanders to the other end of the room where I can hear my brothers having a discussion at the computer. I'll admit it; my curiosity's getting the better of me.

"How many people even have the name Katniss?" I hear Ryan ask.

"Click on that one," Hugh suggests.

"It won't help if there's not a picture."

"Maybe…that one?"

"Hmm…there's a picture. She looks to be about Peeta's age. That could be her!"

I can't keep quiet any longer. "I never told you how old she was!" I yell across the kitchen. Never mind that I don't even know how old she is.

"Stay out of this, Peeta. You said you didn't want to know," Ryan tosses back.

"Maybe we should send this girl an email," Hugh says to Ryan, but raises his voice so that I'm sure to hear him.

"No you won't!" I shout again. "I give up, just tell me what you found."

"Is her last name Everdeen?" asks Ryan.

"I already told you I don't know."

"Well, come look at this picture," Ryan says, motioning me over to the computer. As I approach, he points at the screen. "Is this her?"

The webpage they have open is for a company called D12 Cybersecurity. The name means nothing to me, but then again, Katniss didn't tell me anything about her job. But the picture staring back at me – the dark hair, the stormy grey eyes – is definitely her.

I can't believe they really found her.

Ryan prods me again. "So?"

"Yeah," I say slowly. "Yeah, that's her."

"I knew it!" Hugh exclaims, giving Ryan a high five. He hands me my phone. "Well, go ahead – put her contact information back in your phone."

I freeze. If I was worried about seeming like a stalker before, this is much worse. How could I possibly explain how I'd gotten her work contact information?

"I can't," I say, shaking my head.

"What do you mean, you can't?" Ryan asks.

"This…just doesn't seem right," I struggle to explain. I stare at her picture on the computer screen, almost unable to remember why I'm resisting this so much. But I feel cornered, like they're pushing this on me and not giving me any time to think.

"Peeta, you can't just give up that easily–"

"Stop it!" I shout, cutting off Hugh from making some kind of speech about, I don't know, probably finding my true love or some crap like that. I take a few deep breaths to calm myself. "I've already made up my mind about Katniss. Period. There's no more to discuss."

"Peeta," Dad says as he walks up behind me, "your brothers just don't want you to miss out on something that might be good for you. You don't need to get angry."

Closing my eyes, I will myself to speak as calmly as I can. "I get it. But that attitude hasn't really gotten me anywhere before."

"Well, not every girl is the right one," Dad reminds me. "And I'm sure there's a right one for you somewhere."

"Peeta, do you want to see Katniss again?" Hugh asks.

"I just…" I trail off, shaking my head. "I don't really want to talk about it anymore. Please, you guys?"

The truth is that, yes, I would like to see her again. And I wish she felt the same way about me that I felt about her. But neither of these things are going to happen, and I don't feel like explaining that to my entire family right now. She doesn't have feelings for me, and I'm not going to put myself out there for her just to end up getting hurt.

Thankfully, Dad finally intervenes on my behalf and somehow convinces my brothers to abandon their quest. I walk over to the computer and take my last look at Katniss Everdeen before closing the browser. I feel strange doing this, like it's my last goodbye to her, since we didn't really get to say goodbye in the airport.

At least I'm not ever going to have to say goodbye to her again.

* * *

Chicago summers. They're really my least favorite part of the year. I know people complain about the wind, and the cold, and the snow in winter – but I actually like all that. What I hate are the months when it's so humid, you feel sticky and dirty all the time. And working in a bakery, near the ovens all day long, makes it that much worse.

It's June right now, and really the summer is just beginning. As I pull several loaves of bread from the ovens and wipe the sweat off my brow, I groan at the thought that the worst of the summer is probably still to come.

Today being a normal, slow weekday, only Hugh and I are working. We've both been pretty silent today. It's just too hot to waste energy goofing off or even talking. He takes the loaves I just removed from the oven out front while I start making up another large batch of dough. My hands are completely covered in wet flour when I hear the text message tone on my phone.

"Hugh!" I call toward the front of the bakery.

"What is it?" he yells in response.

"Come back here when you have a minute," I yell, continuing to mix the dough.

A few minutes later, Hugh makes his way back to the kitchen. "Need something, Peeta?"

"Yeah, I just got a text. I think it might be from Delly about Aunt Ewa's retirement party. Can you grab my phone and read it to me?"

"Sure," he says, walking over to grab my phone. His eyes widen as he reads it, and I hear him laugh to himself. "I don't believe this," he mumbles, shaking his head.

"What? Is it Delly?" I ask. I finally finish mixing the new batch of dough, so I set it aside to rise. I make my way toward the sink to wash my hands.

Hugh eyes me with a huge grin on his face. "You have to hear this for yourself."

"I'm all ears," I say, turning my back to him and running my hands under the water.

Hugh clears his throat and begins to read. "Hi Peeta. This is Katniss. Remember me? We met at the airport in January. I'm in Chicago – would you like to meet up?"

My heart nearly stops when Hugh says "Katniss." I barely hear the rest of what he says. I finish washing my hands as quickly as I can, and I rush over to grab the phone from him.

He wasn't joking – the message reads exactly as he said it.

Her contacting me comes as a huge shock, to be honest, since nearly six months have passed since we met. I stuck to my decision not to contact her, and she never reached out to me either. She had the opportunity to contact me if she wanted, but because she didn't, I was even more certain that she never really had feelings for me. I would remind myself of that on the days when I found myself thinking of her too much. Which happened too often, although it was getting a little bit easier as time passed.

But this is going to make me question everything.

"So, Katniss is back," Hugh exclaims gleefully. "What are you going to do, Peeta?"

"I…have no idea," I say, still reeling from the shock of everything.

"Don't do anything stupid," he warns me.

"I won't," I promise. Suddenly, I find myself absolutely certain of what to do. "Back in a few minutes!" I say, rushing out the bakery's back door. I just want to conduct this conversation in private, even if we are just exchanging texts.

If this is a second chance, I'm going to take it. I'm nervous…but I'm dying to see her again.

My response isn't particularly eloquent, but it's sincere at least. "_Wow, Katniss! Yes I remember you and would love to see you. You're here now? How about tonight?_"

I lean against the bakery's back wall, no longer caring about the June heat, as I anxiously await her response. "_Sure. Where and when?"_

Think fast, Peeta. She seems willing, so let's lock this down.

I quickly reply, "_Are you staying downtown? I can meet you there._"

"_Yes, downtown. I just got here though – I'm on the train from the airport right now._"

She's on the train right now. The blue line L train, I imagine. The one that runs right through this neighborhood. A crazy thought occurs to me. I hope it doesn't make me seem too eager or impulsive, but I'm done second-guessing myself when it comes to her.

So I write back, "_R__eally? In that case, would you be willing to meet in a few minutes? Your train goes right through my neighborhood. I can pick you up._"

This is not yet a fully-formed plan. I'm working in the bakery with Hugh, and I don't think he can manage the front and the kitchen by himself. But I reason with myself that he'd want me to do this – making a bold move and going after Katniss.

Of course, it all depends on her answer, which comes back to me quickly. "_Alright. Where do I get off the train?"_

I practically jump in celebration right there behind the bakery when I realize that she actually agreed to my idea. She and I exchange a few more texts so that she knows where to meet me, and then I run back inside to talk to Hugh. I find him in the kitchen placing several sheet pans of cookies into one of the ovens. He looks up expectantly when I enter.

"Well? What happened?" he asks impatiently.

"Hugh, can you do me a huge favor? Can you call Dad and have him cover for me for the afternoon?" I plead.

"Why?" he asks, grinning at me.

"You know why," I say, giving him a pointed look. "Just tell Dad it's an emergency or something. But don't let him think it's anything bad," I add.

He nods. "Alright, but you owe me more details later."

I take a deep breath to calm myself. But remembering the time and the fact that Katniss is already on the train, I run to grab my car keys. "I've got to go. But yes, we'll talk later," I promise as I run out the door. I'm gone so quickly I don't even hear his response.

As I climb into my car, there's one last thing I need to do. Pulling up the text conversation I just had with Katniss, I save her phone number to my contacts. This time, I'm not going to let myself delete it. There is no way I'm wasting this chance.

With that task accomplished, I start the car and leave to meet Katniss at the station.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Sorry it's been so long since I updated this! I'm going to try very hard not to let a month pass between updates again. In fact, the next chapter of this is already written and should be posted within days. Yea!**

**The events in this chapter correspond to chapters 3-7 of Goodbye (Again). If you haven't read that story, the link is in my profile.**

**Many thanks to my beta sunfishdunes for her help with this.**

**Let me know what you think here or on tumblr (soamazinghere).**

* * *

I'm feeling depressed when I get back to my quiet and empty apartment this evening. These past few days with Katniss have been amazing. She's smart, she's funny, she's sarcastic…I don't even care that she's not as talkative as the women I usually date. It just makes me want to try harder to get to know her. Spending even a few hours a day with her has just left me wanting her more.

So why exactly did I let her go tonight without a fight?

When Katniss told me that she didn't want to "force" a relationship between us, everything inside me was screaming for me to convince her that she's wrong, that we wouldn't be forcing anything when we clearly have such strong feelings for each other. Well, I know _I _have strong feelings for her, but I suspect hers are the same.

But instead of acting on that instinct, I decided to let her go. What was I worried about? Probably her flat-out rejecting me instead of giving me the open-ended, "we'll see what happens" kind of response she gave. But in the end, isn't the result the same? She might not have actually rejected me, but it seems unlikely that we'll ever see each other again. I've never been to DC before and don't have any plans to go there now.

I swear, I make the _worst_ decisions sometimes. I didn't accomplish anything by _not _trying to convince her tonight. Did I think that kissing Katniss was going to magically make her change her mind and decide to give us a chance? It doesn't matter what I thought, because she's gone now.

The time I spent with Katniss over the past few days showed me just how stupid I was for writing her off so quickly after we met. I feel so incredibly lucky that she decided to reach out after I deleted all of her contact information. But now that I know how much I want to be with her, it makes it that much harder for me to wrap my head around the fact that I let her go so easily.

Of course, my original concerns are probably still somewhat valid based on Katniss's reaction tonight. After we first met, I was worried that she didn't have any feelings for me. Now I think she probably does – after all, why did she contact me out of the blue after so many months? – but again, I don't think she feels as strongly for me as I do for her. Otherwise, why would she decide _not_ to pursue anything between the two of us? How could she not, if she felt an ounce of what I'm feeling?

_Wait a second, Peeta_. I didn't really try any harder than she did, did I? What if she wanted me to show her my feelings? I let her go without even pushing back a little bit against her reluctance.

What if she's thinking the same thing about me that I'm thinking about her? That I just don't want it, that I'm not particularly interested?

I got the sense from her that if I pushed too hard, if I made my feelings too obvious, it might scare her away. Well…did I really get that from her, or was that just my own insecurities bubbling up? At this point, it's impossible for me to tell anymore. And the damage is done, so I'm not sure it matters, either.

But Katniss _did_ seem interested. When she unexpectedly contacted me with her text message a few days ago, I really didn't know if she just wanted a friendly get-together and nothing more. After our first night together, she agreed to see me the next night, and the next…I can't believe she would've done that if she hadn't felt _something_.

So, is she afraid? Could she be hiding something? I don't know what she could be hiding that would impact the possibility of us being together, unless she has a boyfriend. But way back when we first met, I managed to not-so-sneakily ask her if she had a boyfriend and she said no. So unless she was lying (and she doesn't seem like the type to do that) or something has changed over the past few months, I feel pretty confident that's not the problem.

She let me kiss her tonight, and she kissed me back. That's _got_ to mean something. I don't think I'll ever forget the way her lips felt when they were touching mine. It wasn't necessarily the kiss itself, it was this feeling of…connection. Or completeness. I don't even know how to describe it. But she had to feel it too.

I have options, though. I don't have to take her words as a final answer, right? There's still time to tell her what I wished I'd said earlier.

I double-check the contacts on my phone. _Katniss Everdeen._ There's her number, and this time I _know_ I won't be deleting it. As long as I have that, I could get in touch with her anytime. I don't think she'd mind…

As I methodically go through my usual routine of getting ready for bed (not that I'll be able to sleep tonight), I decide that I have to do something. I think – no, I _know_ – that my feelings for Katniss are too strong to ignore. I lie down in my bed, staring at the ceiling and trying to figure out what to do next.

* * *

"Peeta! Peeta!" I hear my brothers yelling, accompanied by loud knocking on my front door. My brothers are always like this – I'm sure the neighbors love it when I have them over.

I hurry to the door and throw it open, ushering them inside before they can make any more noise. I have a feeling I know why they're so eager to talk to me tonight. Hugh briefly met Katniss at the bakery a few days ago, and I should've guessed that he wouldn't be able to keep the news to himself. My only question right now is exactly _how many_ of our family members he told.

Ryan throws a bag of Chinese takeout on my kitchen counter and wastes no time in getting to the point. "So, we brought food in exchange for details. What happened with Katniss?"

"Hello to you, too," I say wryly as I peer into the plastic bag. "If there are no pork dumplings in here," I tell him as I rifle through the bag, examining each carton, "then you're not getting anything from me."

"Of course we brought them." Hugh takes the bag from me and reaches to the bottom, pulling out the dumplings and handing them to me. "But you owe us! I saw her for like, five minutes the other day. Why didn't you bring her back to meet us?"

"You think I'd waste my time with that?" I ask incredulously. "She was only here for three days."

Ryan grabs as many cartons as he can fit into his hands and dumps them unceremoniously onto the coffee table in the middle of my living room. Settling onto the floor, he rips apart his chopsticks and begins eating. "_Plenty_ of time to introduce her to your brothers," he teases in between bites of orange chicken.

I settle onto the couch and steal half of the pork dumplings for myself, in a pre-emptive exchange for all the details I'm sure they'll end up prying out of me. Hugh follows us into the living room and tears into a carton of lo mein.

Ryan tries again. "But seriously, Peeta, what happened? When are you seeing her again?"

Katniss doesn't seem like the type of person who'd appreciate me giving out too many details of our private lives to others – even if they are my brothers – so I decide not to say much. Sure, she'll probably never find out, given that she doesn't seem to want a relationship…but for some reason, I still find myself wanting to do this much for her. As if it'll make a difference.

"We had…a great time together," I say carefully. "Katniss is an amazing person."

"When's the wedding?" Hugh asks sarcastically. I shake my head and he continues, "You have to give us more than that! You completely avoided Ry's questions!"

"She's…" I trail off, trying to decide what to tell them. "Katniss isn't interested in a long-distance relationship." There it is – the truth. Wonder how they'll take it.

Ryan gives me a confused look as he fumbles with his chopsticks in a container of rice. "What does that even mean? You're not seeing her again?"

"You just let her leave?" Hugh adds.

"Yeah, I'm probably not seeing her again," I admit slowly. I chew thoughtfully on a dumpling as the finality of those words washes over me. I really didn't like saying that out loud. This isn't what _I_ want at all. "It's not that I don't want to see her. She just…I don't know why…" I shrug. "She ended it when she left."

"Really, Peeta?" Ryan groans. "We're going to have to fix this for him – again," he says, looking at Hugh in exasperation. He pulls out his phone and starts typing.

"Um, guys, it's not up to me." Reasoning with my brothers doesn't usually work well, but it's worth a shot. "I can't _force_ her to date me. And what exactly are you doing on your phone?" I ask Ryan.

"Trying to figure out something to help you out," he answers.

"Good idea," says Hugh, kneeling on the floor and looking over Ryan's shoulder. "Peeta, I've never seen you so excited over a girl. You can't give up this easily."

"I don't need your help," I tell them firmly.

"Please, you wouldn't have even met her again if she hadn't contacted you," Ryan reminds me, without looking up from his phone. "We found her contact info months ago and you refused to use it. Idiot."

"You need to do something big to win her over. Let her know how you feel," Hugh enthuses.

"Look at this!" Ryan says excitedly, bringing his phone over and shoving it in my face. "Cheap plane tickets to DC! Just go show up on her doorstep."

"No!" I say, pushing the phone away. "I don't even know where she lives."

"But you know where she works. Let me pull up the website…" Ryan resumes typing into his phone.

"No."

"Don't you want to see her again?" Hugh asks.

I put my food on the table and lean forward, resting my elbows on my knees. "Yeah," I admit thoughtfully. "But I don't know what to do. Something tells me Katniss wouldn't appreciate me showing up at her office with a bouquet of roses."

"Well, do something. And soon – you _just_ saw her, this is your best chance." Hugh says.

There's a small part of me that knows my brothers are right: I'd be stupid to let Katniss go without a fight. I've been slowly moving toward that conclusion myself over the past few days, but I'm not going to make some sort of grand romantic gesture – I don't think Katniss would ever forgive me for that.

But I'm more certain than ever that I have to do something to let her know how I feel. Maybe she'll think it's strange for me to get back in touch with her just days after we agreed not to. I hope she can overlook that and give me a chance. I don't want to let her get away. Not without at least a little bit of a fight.

I'll have to think about this more – preferably _without_ my brothers' help.

* * *

Eventually I figured out what I needed to do. I guess the push from my brothers helped – even if their actual ideas for winning over Katniss were completely insane. But all that matters in the end is that I did _something_, and it led to me being where I am now – in DC, spending the weekend with Katniss.

I didn't go the "grand gesture" route, unless you consider sending someone flowers to be a grand gesture. I don't. But I wanted to let Katniss know that I decided not to give up so easily, and just see how she would react. When she texted me a thank-you acknowledging the flowers, I figured that meant I at least had a chance. She could have ignored me very easily if she really wanted to cut off all contact.

In the end, I have to admit that my brothers' help wasn't completely worthless – when I called Katniss out of the blue a few days after sending the flowers, at least I knew that there were some plane tickets to DC that I could afford. I planned to try my hardest to convince her to let me visit, because I didn't really see any way to win her over by phone. We barely knew each other at the time, and we needed to be together to make sure this was the right thing to do. Well, I never really doubted it, but I think she needed time. I'd give her that much.

And now that I'm here, now that we've spent almost an entire weekend together, I'm more certain about Katniss than I've ever been. I can't imagine letting her go.

I hear creaking floorboards above me, which I assume is Katniss walking around upstairs getting ready for bed. I'm lying somewhat uncomfortably on a sagging air mattress in the living room of her apartment. Not that I'm complaining, though. This trip was my idea, and I sprung it on her at the last minute. She could've sent me to a hotel; in fact, that's what I thought she'd do. When she suggested that I stay here, I was elated. I tried not to show it, though – I didn't want her to get the wrong idea.

But being here means more time spent together just getting to know each other. It means we can lounge around in front of the TV in our pajamas before bed, and it means that I get to see her adorably messed-up hair before she takes a shower in the morning. She probably has no idea the effect that these little details have on me, but I wouldn't give up these moments for anything.

My flight home is tomorrow and I'm finding it painful to imagine leaving her again. Of course, I'll have to get used to that feeling if we decide to keep seeing each other. How do other couples manage to do that? To live in different cities, to only see each other for a few days each month?

But I'm getting ahead of myself again. As much as I might want it, Katniss and I aren't a couple. She has to want it, too.

We've avoided the topic of our relationship all weekend. And I've been fine with that for the most part – I want to _show_ her how I feel about her, and give her a chance to see that this is right. I figured that spending a normal weekend together, like a normal couple would do, would give her a chance to sort out how she feels about me. To see that she doesn't want to give this up any more than I do. I hope I've succeeded.

I guess I was also hoping that she would raise the topic of our relationship herself. If _I_ do, I worry that she'll feel pressured or have an instinct to pull away from me. We're still figuring things out between the two of us right now, and I don't want to risk ruining everything before we've even really gotten started. She needs to know without a doubt that she wants this.

But here's the thing: I don't have all the time in the world to win her over. I really only have this weekend, and I don't know if that's enough time to erase her doubts. We don't even have any plans to see each other again, and I have no idea how we'll carry this relationship forward when we're apart. If we don't talk, I worry that inertia will just carry us further and further apart from each other. Living in different cities, we'll have to make a real effort to stay close to each other.

If she doesn't speak up, I'll have to say something before I leave tomorrow. It seems risky, but what other choice do I have? Honestly, I'm scared – scared that saying anything will be worse than saying nothing. My biggest fear is that if I press her for a decision about our relationship, her default response will be "no" unless she's completely sure about me. What if I talk to her and she ends this? What if I just leave her alone for a little longer and give her time to make up her mind?

But every instinct in me is trying to override the "what ifs" running through my head. My gut is telling me that I _have _to talk to Katniss. I've never felt this strong of a connection with any woman before and I feel this gnawing fear in my stomach when I think of letting that go. Letting _Katniss_ go. I'm falling for her, which is _crazy_ given how little I know her – but it's true. I have to try.

* * *

"Hand me a few of those avocados," Delly asks, pointing at the shelf off to my side.

"How many?"

She furrows her brow, probably trying to remember how many people are coming to the party tonight. Shaking her head, she says, "Um…just take all the ripe ones. There's probably not that many."

I bag up the avocados – maybe about twenty of them are actually ripe enough to use today – and carefully place the bag in the bottom of my cart, being careful not to bruise them. Delly and I were asked to do the grocery shopping for a family barbeque tonight and we just got started, so we'll be here awhile. We each have our own cart and they'll probably both be full by the time we finish.

As we continue to very slowly make our way through the produce section, Delly's face brightens and she turns to me abruptly. "I almost forgot to ask about your trip last weekend – tell me all about it! You went to visit _a girl_, I heard." She raises her eyebrows at me expectantly.

I laugh and feel a blush creeping over my face. Delly's one of my best friends – she's like my sister really – and we usually tell each other everything. But I've been keeping details about Katniss close to my chest; for some reason, I don't feel comfortable sharing too much. Especially after my recent trip to DC. I tried to talk to Katniss when I left her at the airport; I'm not sure I said everything I wanted or needed to say, but I'm feeling hopeful. Not confident or assured of her decision about us becoming a couple by any means – but still, hopeful.

I clear my throat. "How much do you already know?"

Delly giggles at my response. "My sources are unreliable," she informs me with a gleam in her eye. "Besides," she says, nudging me with her shoulder, "I want to hear it from you."

We take a brief minute to consult our list to ensure that we got everything we needed from the produce section. Next we move to the meat. I place an order for ten pounds of ground beef and turn back to resume my discussion with Delly. "Let's see…her name is Katniss. She lives in Washington, DC. I met her back in Jan – "

Delly cuts me off impatiently. "Yes, yes, I know all that. Your brother told me. I want to know how _serious_ this is. What's she like?"

Talk about complicated questions to answer. Where do I even begin? "I don't know how serious we are," I admit. "We're still figuring it out. I think there's something there, though."

"Aw, so sweet."

"Katniss is…nothing like any of the other girls I've dated. She's hard to describe – you just have to meet her. After she and I first talked, I just…couldn't shake her. I kept thinking about her." Trying to convey Katniss in words and express my feelings for her is proving very difficult.

"Hmm…I hope I get to meet her, then," Delly muses. I'm silent. I can't make any promises given that Katniss and I don't even have plans to see each other, much less meet our families. "Why haven't you told me anything about Katniss before if you met her months ago?"

I shrug. "We lost touch." Okay, that's kind of a lie, but it would kill Delly to know the truth. She's just as much of a romantic as my brothers – she'd think I was an idiot for letting Katniss go.

And she'd be right, of course.

We navigate our carts carefully through the narrow aisles, and I feel compelled to tell Delly more about my situation. "Katniss just got back in touch recently when she was in Chicago for work."

"So, she came after you? She wanted to see you?" Delly asks.

"Well, I guess she wouldn't have gotten in touch unless she wanted to see me," I begin, "but she definitely didn't 'come after me.'"

"What do you mean?"

"I think she just contacted me for…for…" I struggle to find the right words. I'm not really sure I know why Katniss got back in touch with me. "A friendly get-together? But we both felt something more, and things just moved forward from there."

"Okay…so where do things stand now?" Delly inquires, cocking her head to the side and narrowing her eyes contemplatively.

"I'm not really sure," I admit reluctantly. "Katniss is…skittish. She doesn't seem ready to commit to anything. I'll have to try hard to convince her, especially given the long-distance thing."

"Hmm, _not_ a position that Peeta Mellark usually finds himself in," Delly notes in an amused tone.

I roll my eyes. "_Come on_, Del. A quick glance at my dating history shows what a stellar record I have with women."

"Oh yeah, _stellar_." Delly stops for a minute and gives me a look that I can't quite read. "Is Katniss worth it?"

Without hesitation, I nod my head and answer, "Yeah, she definitely is. I've never felt like this about anyone else."

"Wow," Delly says softly. "What are you going to do?"

"Who knows?" I tell her truthfully. "I've never been in a long-distance relationship before. It's hard to charm someone over the phone."

"If anyone could, you could," Delly nods, laughing.

I snort. "Something tells me the good old Mellark charms won't work on Katniss."

Delly and I take one last look at our list and then begin wheeling our heaping carts toward the checkout lanes. As we stand in line, Delly claps her hands gleefully and grabs my arm. "I know! Bring her here, have her meet all of us. We'll convince her for you!"

I know she's joking, and I can't help but laugh at the mental image of Katniss faced with my extended family. She wouldn't just run, she'd sprint far, far away. I'd never see her again, I'm sure of it. "Something tells me that _really_ won't work," I say.

Delly laughs along with me for a moment before quieting down and squeezing my hand. "I'm so excited for you," she tells me sincerely.

I smile back at her. "I'm excited too. This feels…different, somehow. I just have to figure out how to convince her that we're worth it." It's as simple as that, isn't it? It may be simple, but I know it's not going to be easy.

* * *

Well, it turned out to be easier than I thought. I didn't have to lift a finger to convince Katniss to be with me. I didn't even have to charm her, or…anything. She just called me. And told me that she wants us to be a couple. That's that.

It's not as if I was going to say _no_. More like, _hell yes_!

I clap my hand over my mouth as I laugh in disbelief. _Did that just happen_? There's no one but me in the bakery today, so it's hard to say for certain whether or not it was a dream. I lean against the counter behind me, forgetting my work for a moment. I'm still in shock.

A giddy smile covers my face, and I'm sure I look crazy but I don't care. Katniss and I are together now…for real this time. I can't remember the last time I felt this happy.

Her decision came completely out of the blue. I didn't see it coming at all. I've spent days plotting and strategizing, trying to use what little I know about her personality to figure out how to win her over. I hadn't even had a chance to put any plans into motion yet. She decided on her own; I _really_ thought she was going to take a lot more convincing.

I can't _believe_ I'm alone right now. Today, of all days. Aside from Katniss (who I wish more than anything was here with me), there's no one I'd rather see than my brothers or my dad, so that I could tell them the good news. I'm practically bursting. I need to tell someone.

Just as I'm about to go and grab my phone to call one of my brothers, I hear the door open in the front of the bakery. Damn – I really don't want to deal with customers right now. It's hard for me to concentrate on anything other than my thoughts of Katniss, but I don't really have any choice, given that I'm here alone. I take a deep breath and try to control the swirl of emotions I'm feeling, wiping the silly smile off my face and replacing it with a more appropriate, customer-friendly one.

I step through the door to the front. "How can I help you?" I say pleasantly to the old woman who just entered.

My mind almost immediately starts to wander back to Katniss as I go through the motions of grabbing and wrapping the bread loaves that the woman requested. After the last time that Katniss and I spoke on the phone – which was only about four days ago – I thought she needed more time to figure everything out. Maybe _a lot_ more time. She was just as unwilling to commit as she always had been, and she still seemed hung up on the long-distance thing.

But I'm not complaining. I've known for so long now that I want to be with her. Practically since she first stepped off the train back in June when we made our spur-of-the-moment plan to see each other. Or if I'm being honest, maybe even since I spent the night with her at the airport back in January. If I'd listened to my better instincts back then, I would never have deleted her number from my phone. And maybe I could've saved myself a few months of longing to see her again and second-guessing my choice.

I've wanted her for so long that it almost feels unreal that she could feel the same way about me. But I know this is right – I know that she and I are right for each other.

How am I going to wait almost two weeks to see her again? It feels like forever, when all I want to do is hold her in my arms and celebrate the fact that she's finally mine. Talking on the phone feels like such a poor substitute for having her here with me. Where she belongs.

I hate to admit it, but there are some doubts in the back of my mind. Not about her, and not about my feelings, but about whether she was ready to make this decision. As elated as I am that she wants us to be a couple, I'm terrified that she might change her mind. I'm already in too deep. It'd hurt too much to lose her now.

I return slowly to the kitchen after the old woman pays for her purchases. As distracted as I am, I have to keep the bakery running until we close. I glance at the clock on the wall – _four more hours_! I hope business is slow tonight. I don't trust myself to concentrate on my work.

I begin methodically mixing the dough for a large batch of sugar cookies. It's something I've done thousands of times before, so I should be able to accomplish this on autopilot. Dumping the ingredients into the mixer, I watch somewhat absently as a smooth dough starts to form.

How do I deal with my feelings around Katniss? I almost worry about coming on too strong when I see her again. It's going to take everything in me to make it through the next two weeks until she visits, and I don't think I'll be able to hold back when she's finally here. I don't want to scare her off.

Maybe I'm over-thinking things. I've never had a long-distance relationship before, and I've been so caught up in waiting for Katniss to make a decision that I haven't given any thought to managing one. But if this is real – and I think it is – we're going to have to put some serious effort into making it work. I'm already starting to get a sense of how hard it is. And I've only been in a long-distance relationship for, what, an hour?

I know it'll take a lot to get it right. But I'll do it for Katniss. For us. Whatever it takes.

* * *

Once I'm finally able to reach my brothers and tell them the news about Katniss, it's obvious they're thrilled for me. Hugh and Ryan assume that I had more to do with her decision than I really did, and I let them think they're right. I don't know how long I'll be able to keep up the charade – I'll probably crack if they press me for details. My brothers know me too well, and they can always tell when I'm lying. Plus they insisted on taking me out to celebrate tonight, which, knowing them, means we'll all end up drunk by the end of the evening. Alcohol makes me even chattier than normal. I wouldn't be at all surprised to find out that they were taking me out tonight and getting me drunk just to get more details out of me than they'd get sober.

I still have an hour or two before I expect my brothers to come over, and I'm lying on my couch watching TV. After spending all day alone in the bakery, I'm exhausted. I've almost fallen asleep in front of the local news when I'm startled by the text message tone on my phone. I quickly grab it, assuming it's Ryan or Hugh sending me details about our evening. I'm wrong though, and I smile to myself when I see who it is – Prim.

"_Congratulations!_" her simple message reads, followed by a thumbs-up emoji. Of course she's happy for us. She's always tried to help me out when it comes to understanding the enigma that is Katniss.

I quickly write back: "_Thanks! I feel so incredibly lucky to have found your sister._"

Placing the phone on the coffee table just across from where I'm lying, I close my eyes again. Prim doesn't write back for several minutes. Although I was ready for a nap just a minute ago, talking to Katniss's sister has brought back all the excitement I was feeling earlier. I wonder what Katniss told her?

Eventually Prim responds. "_Sorry. K got mad that I was texting you – I had to pretend to go to sleep. We need to talk soon!_"

And another message from Prim quickly follows: "_Until we talk, just wanted to say I think you'll be good for Katniss._"

So Katniss was right there when Prim sent her first text. What were they talking about? Is she feeling as giddy as I am right now? I'd love to know, but that's just too much to ask. I could ask Katniss, but not her sister. Instead, I content myself with writing, "_I hope so. I'd do anything for her._"

Prim replies, "_Good! You're gonna have to work for it._"

I laugh to myself as I read her response. She can't possibly know how hard I'd work to keep Katniss, and make her happy, but…well, let's just say I'm not kidding when I said I'd do anything for her. "_Katniss took the first step_," I write back. "_That's one battle down! I'll figure out the rest later._"

"_Right, I didn't expect that at all. But I'm happy for you and I'll call you soon! Now I really should get to sleep…_"

"_Talk to you soon, Prim. Good night!_" I'm feeling content and optimistic as I put away my phone. If Prim wants to give me some pointers on making Katniss happy, I'll gladly take them. She's not the easiest woman to figure out. I'll need some help to keep this relationship going.

But I don't want to focus on potential future difficulties right now. I just want to focus on how happy Katniss has made me today. I wish she were here with me now, but long-distance is my new reality. My brothers' company will have to be enough for tonight.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: In my quest to try to catch up with the main story, here is another Peeta POV! This one covers chapters 8-10 of the main story. After this, I would guess that there will be about 2-3 more Peeta chapters that will cover the rest of Goodbye (Again).**

**As always, thanks to my beta sunfishdunes.**

**I'm soamazinghere on tumblr and twitter if you want to say hi.**

* * *

I let out a deep breath that I didn't even realize I was holding and fall backwards onto the couch. That didn't go well. To say the least.

Tomorrow I'm flying out to DC to visit Katniss, which is always a good thing. I look forward to seeing her more than anything else and our all-too-infrequent weekends spent together are what keep our relationship going. But flying back and forth once or twice every month is expensive. I've been blowing through my savings and I just don't think I can afford to continue flying out there as much as I have been. I didn't think that Katniss would by any means be pleased when I suggested alternatives to meeting in-person, but I at least thought she would be understanding and _try_ to be sympathetic. I didn't expect her to practically blow up in my face.

So now, not only do I have to worry about when I'll see her again (because after this weekend neither of us have plans to visit the other), but I also have to worry about potentially having ruined the last weekend we'll spend together for who knows how long.

Katniss is great, but her inability to engage in any serious or difficult conversations frustrates me. It's hard work being a long-distance couple and it's natural that problems will come up. But when I make an effort to talk about it and work through it, and _this_ is what happens…well, let's just say I don't know if I'll be trying that again any time soon.

Not long after Katniss and I became a couple, Prim called me and told me a lot of her fears and concerns for our relationship. I was surprised that Prim would be so candid with me, especially given what I know about Katniss's personality – she would never in a million years want Prim to be telling me these things. But at the same time, I wasn't going to stop her if she was trying to help. And she was.

Prim told me that it was a big deal for Katniss to have even agreed to see me, much less have a long-distance relationship. As much as she thought that Katniss and I were good for each other, she wasn't optimistic that Katniss would make that choice. She warned me, without really elaborating on the reasons, that Katniss has a lot of fears about the distance but that she probably wouldn't share them with me. She tends to keep her emotions to herself under the pretense of always staying strong and refusing to show weakness. Prim told me that it'd be up to me to help Katniss along, and make sure that she talks to me without bottling up all her fears.

Okay, fine. That's a lot to deal with, but none of it truly _surprised_ me. I could get a sense of that from just being around Katniss and the process of getting to know her better, but I figured that any effort would be worth it. Because success would mean that I got to keep Katniss in my life.

So today, when I brought up my concerns about the cost of plane tickets, I thought I was doing what Prim said I needed to do: making sure that Katniss and I talked about our issues rather than avoiding them. And it's not as if I could ignore this problem anyway – at some point, I'd simply be unable to keep buying plane tickets.

I don't blame Prim for what happened, but I'm still stunned at Katniss's reaction. I guess I expected her to be willing to talk to me, as long as I brought up any challenges first. I didn't realize that she'd just be unwilling to talk _at all_. She told me that she needed "time to think." About what? There was nothing ambiguous about what I told her, and I thought I made some helpful suggestions like talking on the phone more or spending more time in Chicago.

When I give it more thought, though, I probably shouldn't have been so caught off guard by how Katniss reacted. Especially when I suggested that we try to talk more on the phone. _Oh god_. I drop my head into my hands, feeling suddenly embarrassed that I even made the suggestion. It's plainly obvious how much Katniss hates talking on the phone – I mean, she's an entirely different person when we're together. On the phone, she's at best quiet and at worst downright awkward. But I'm fine with it, because I know that's just how she is, and I simply like hearing her voice. I should've realized how she'd feel.

But I still don't understand why she was so offended when I told her she could just come to see me more often. I know that puts an additional burden and expense on her. But it's obvious that she makes more money than I do. Probably a lot more. Maybe I shouldn't have brought up the money thing? I was just trying to explain where I was coming from, and I thought it made sense to be honest.

I'm starting to feel like there's a lot that doesn't make sense when it comes to Katniss. It really frustrates me that I don't know her better by now. We've been together for months – you'd think I'd know her well enough that I wouldn't have to spend so much time speculating and obsessing over her reactions to every little thing I say.

I wonder how she's going to act when I see her tomorrow. Will she be angry? Will this be hanging over our heads all weekend? She said she still wanted to see me, but she ended our phone call kind of abruptly.

We just need to forget about this conversation for now. This doesn't feel like the right decision, but…I think I'm just going to drop the topic and hope she forgets about it. I don't want to freak her out any more than I already have. This obviously doesn't change anything about my money situation and plane tickets aren't going to start magically appearing out of thin air, but what else can I do if she won't be more reasonable? I'll shut up if that's what Katniss needs.

* * *

It's hard not to smile when both Prim and Effie are together in the same place. They're both so similar to each other in many ways; it's difficult to believe that they're not mother and daughter. They're so expressive, open, and easy to talk to – they're like a lot of my Mellark relatives, to be honest. Maybe that's why it's so easy for me to get along with them.

Effie gives me a big hug as she stands near the front door of the apartment getting ready to leave. "It was so nice finally meeting you, Peeta," she enthuses, patting my hand warmly. "You'll have to get Katniss to bring you down to Virginia to visit me soon."

"I will," I tell her. "Have a safe trip home!"

Prim rushes down the stairs from her room, carrying her overnight bag. She says goodbye to Katniss and me quickly, giving us each a squeeze and a kiss on the cheek. As she and Effie head out the front door, she turns back to Katniss. "I'll be back tomorrow night around seven. Feel free to do _whatever you want_ before then," she says, raising her eyebrows suggestively. "Bye!"

As the door closes, my smile quickly fades. Effie made a comment at dinner that I've been mulling over all evening. Something about a guy named Gale and how he ruined Katniss for other men. That comment, and Katniss's over-the-top reaction to it – pretending to choke and making a big scene – makes me curious. I'm wondering if she hasn't been trying to hide something from me all along.

"I'm going to do the dishes," Katniss tells me, breaking me out of my reverie.

"Oh…let me help clean up," I offer and follow her to the kitchen.

As Katniss and I work silently side-by-side in the tiny kitchen, occasionally bumping into each other as we move around the room, my thoughts wander again. Katniss isn't trying to hide anything from me. There's no way she is. She may have a lot of flaws – we all do – but lying isn't one of them.

But then again, hiding things and lying aren't exactly the same thing. Katniss is a pro at avoiding conversations she doesn't want to have. Was Gale an old boyfriend? How serious were they? I would imagine they were very serious, given Effie's comment. How else could you interpret that? So why is this the first I'm hearing about him?

If Gale's just a former boyfriend, why doesn't Katniss want me to know about him? Judging from the way she reacted when Effie let that information slip, I would assume that she doesn't want to discuss it.

Katniss's voice breaks through my thoughts again. "Peeta? Peeta?" she asks, narrowing her eyes at me in concern. "Are you okay?"

I smile weakly at her and nod my head. "I'm fine. What is it?"

"Um," she starts, giving me an unreadable look. "Can you get me a clean dish towel?"

I retrieve the towel from a drawer and make myself busy cleaning up the stove. Katniss turns her back to me as she starts drying and putting away some of the dishes.

I feel guilty thinking about how this Gale thing has unsettled me so much. We both have a history of dating other people, and she doesn't know mine any more than I know hers. It's unfair of me to worry this much just because of what Effie said.

It's not necessarily the fact that she was in a relationship with this Gale person, I suppose. I'm bothered by the fact that I didn't know about it. If it's as significant as what Effie suggested, it feels like I should know about it. Like it's a detail of her life that she should've shared. Maybe I'm just rationalizing here, but none of my past girlfriends were that serious. They weren't worth mentioning to Katniss. But if they had been, I would've said something.

Right?

_This_ is why the long-distance thing really kills me. There are so many things about Katniss that I just don't know. And there's no opportunity for these topics to arise organically – when we're together, I feel like I have to focus on other things to make our visit perfect. We plan all these activities for each other, and spend lots of time in bed, and at the end of the day, there's not much time for "normal" couple things. Like just sitting around doing nothing. Or talking that's not all about "catching up."

It makes me sad to realize that there's probably no reason I would've known about Gale. When would she have told me? It's like there's no way for me to get to know her – at least, not in the context of our relationship – without sitting her down and basically interviewing her. How romantic.

"I'm getting tired, Peeta," Katniss informs me as she puts the last dish into the cabinet over her head. "Can we go to bed?"

"Sure," I say, reaching almost automatically for her hand and pulling her toward the stairs. She leans her head on my shoulder and smiles up at me. I wish we had more moments like these.

Maybe I should just leave this alone. Maybe this is none of my business. I don't have any reason to distrust Katniss, so I should just let her tell me more when she wants to. Or when she's ready to.

I walk into Katniss's bedroom, quickly changing into my pajamas and lying down heavily on the bed. I can hear Katniss brushing her teeth in the bathroom at the end of the hallway. Before she comes back, I'm going to try my hardest to forget about what Effie said and start acting like myself again. I just want to actually _enjoy_ the time that Katniss and I have together.

* * *

It's funny how much my life revolves around Katniss these days. Even when we're apart, like now, the days I look forward to the most are the ones when I get to talk to her. I have plenty of family and friends to keep me busy and distract me when necessary, but things just aren't the same without her. I feel empty when she's not around. Not unhappy, but just a little…incomplete.

Talking to Katniss on the phone – just hearing her voice – is what gets me through the long stretches of time when we're apart. It's been almost two weeks since I last saw her in DC. We've talked on the phone a few times since then (fewer than I'd like, honestly), and I send her text messages often, just to let her know I'm thinking about her. We're planning to talk again tonight, and I've been looking forward to it all day. All _week_, really.

She's on a business trip right now in Miami. I like to talk to her when she's traveling because – as much as I hate to admit it – I always find myself getting a little anxious when I know she's traveling alone. It's completely irrational. Katniss is one of the strongest and most capable people I know. It's one of the many things I admire about her. She's a total road warrior.

But still. If she can't be with me, I'm most comfortable knowing she's at least in the safety of her own home. Not off by herself in an unfamiliar city. But I won't tell her that. She'd just scoff and tell me that I'm stupid for worrying about her, maybe citing some statistics about crime or car accidents or something. She wouldn't consider for a minute that sometimes we have foolish, unfounded worries about people we care for. People we love.

And there's another thing I can't tell her – yet. I've come to the realization that I am in love with Katniss Everdeen. I've known for awhile now that I felt very strongly for her, that I cared deeply, but I wasn't smart enough to understand my own feelings until recently. Then it just hit me all of a sudden that everything I feel for her, and the pain I suffer when we're apart, means more than I can fully grasp. It means that I _love_ her.

But something tells me that she's not ready to hear it, so I'm not going to say it. And I know she's not going to say it back to me, anyway. So I'll wait.

I glance at the clock on the wall in my living room. It's almost time for Katniss to call me, but I decide to send her a quick text to remind her. She hates it when I do that, but she has a tendency to lose track of time and forget to call. For that very reason, I usually try to call her (I'm so eager I'd _never_ forget), but when she's traveling, she always insists on calling me. She says it makes more sense that way, since she never knows what she'll be doing in the evenings when she travels.

Pulling out my phone, I type, "_Are you still calling me tonight?_"

I settle back on the couch and turn on the TV, absently flipping through the channels as I wait for her call. Not too surprisingly, the time we planned to talk comes and goes without me hearing from her. I try to call her instead, but the phone rings and rings, eventually going to voice mail without her ever picking up. I leave a message asking her call me, and for good measure I send another text message asking her where she is. She's not likely to see my message if she's not even answering her phone, but I do it anyway.

I sit impatiently, nervously tapping my feet, as more time passes without a call from Katniss. It's not as if this has never happened before, but she's never been traveling at the time, so I'm starting to worry. I grab my phone and send her another text before I can even talk myself out of it. "_Can you give me a call back soon?_"

She hates it when I do this. When she misses a phone date, I have a bad habit of unintentionally bombarding her with texts and voice mails. Well…I guess it's disingenuous to call the texting "unintentional" – it's just how I cope with how powerless I feel when I can't reach her. But she often sounds annoyed when we finally do reach each other – she's never told me so directly, but I can hear it in her voice. I'm not sure she realizes how badly I want to talk to her and how much I look forward to our calls.

A part of me wonders if she purposely delays or misses our phone dates. At her best, she's never been very talkative on the phone, but recently she seems almost…cold. She never wants to talk for very long and she's only interested in discussing the most superficial things about her life. I worry that she's pulling away from me, but I can't figure out why. I've been trying to call and text her more recently, to remind her that I'm still here and trying to reconnect with her. But I'm not sure it's working.

I unlock the screen on my phone, double and triple checking to make sure I didn't miss any calls or messages from Katniss. Nope – nothing. And it's been an hour now since she was supposed to call. That's out of the ordinary, even for Katniss. I usually hear something from her, even if she just has to cancel. I'm really worried now, which is frustrating because there's _nothing_ I can do.

Well, I can call her again, I guess. Of course, there's no answer when I try to reach her, so I leave another message. "Hey, it's me," I say to her voice mail. "Can you call me as soon as you get this message? We were supposed to talk an hour ago. I'm a little worried."

A few more minutes of pacing and feeling completely helpless, and I break down and text her again. She's going to kill me, assuming she's hasn't been in a car accident or gotten mugged or something. I shake my head, trying to clear out these negative thoughts. I'm sure she's fine. Just…late. I type: "_Katniss, are you okay? I'm getting worried. Please call._"

I try to distract myself with the TV again, but it doesn't work. I'm on the verge of calling her hotel when I hear the text message tone on my phone. I grab it quickly and let out a sigh of relief. It's Katniss. Her message reads simply, "_Call you in 5 minutes_."

Now that she's finally acknowledged me, I start to relax. But at the same time, I feel kind of angry toward her. She knows how much I worry about her, so why can't she make more effort here? She must have seen my messages and realized that I was getting frantic (even if I shouldn't have been). Doesn't she understand how hard it is for me when we're so far apart and there's nothing I can do?

I try to tell myself to calm down. At least I'll get to talk to her soon and reassure myself that she's fine. Hearing from her always makes me feel better.

* * *

Katniss surprised me with her idea to visit this weekend, but it's not an unwelcome surprise at all. I knew I'd been missing her, but I don't think I realized exactly how much I _needed _to see her until she was here. Katniss seems to feel the same way. I think that somehow we both recognized that things in our relationship had been heading downhill and that we needed to see each other again to try to fix it.

The only problem is that neither of us have acknowledged our troubles out loud since she arrived, which will probably make it more difficult to work things out. I want to talk to her, I really do, but we've just been so distracted this weekend. Distracted in a good way, I think, enjoying being with each other again. But distracted nonetheless.

Or maybe I'm just making excuses and we're actually avoiding talking. I'm not sure.

I'd be lying if I said I felt secure in our relationship right now. I've actually had this ominous feeling for awhile now, like I'm just waiting for something to happen. Not sure what I'm waiting for, though. I'm scared to death to do _anything_, because I don't know what's going to cause the other shoe to drop. Honestly, I'm just scared of losing the woman I love.

The only thing giving me hope is how well things seem to go when we're together. But that only gets us so far – how often do we manage that? Four or five days a month? It's hard to really be a couple when our relationship is basically on life support every single day that we're apart.

And as good as it feels to have Katniss visiting me, I'm stressed out because we have to attend this family get-together at my aunt's house. When Katniss suggested coming this weekend, I certainly wasn't going to say no, but I knew there would be no way to avoid this party. And no way to continue avoiding introducing her to my entire family. It's a miracle that I've managed to keep her to myself for this long, but I did it because I knew she was freaked out at the prospect of meeting everyone.

I'm not sure that the relationship that we're so tenuously holding together right now is going to benefit from the added stress of her finally meeting the Mellarks. Who am I kidding? This is probably a horrible idea. In fact, we hadn't been here for even fifteen minutes before I'd already lost track of Katniss. Delly intercepted her soon after we arrived and I haven't seen either of them since. I'm nervous.

Most of my evening has been spent here in the kitchen. Aunt Ewa waylaid me pretty much as soon as Katniss and I arrived and put me to work. I suspect it may have been a ploy to get Katniss away from me so that she could be forced to meet _everyone_. I would've tried my hardest to keep her with me and prevent her from ending up too overwhelmed, but my family isn't very good at respecting those kinds of wishes. They've been dying to meet her ever since Hugh let it slip that I had a new girlfriend (which happened way before Katniss and I were even a couple, but that didn't seem to bother him in the least).

Out of the corner of my eye, I spot my brother Ryan talking to some of our cousins in the dining room. Ryan's been a bit more understanding of my desire to keep Katniss away from any large family gatherings so far. His own fiancée went through a long adjustment period before she was comfortable here, so he knows first-hand how difficult it can be for people who didn't grow up in Mellark-land. I try to catch his attention over the din of the party all around us. "Ry! Ry!" I yell, waving my hand in the air. I'd try to make my way to him but I have to tend to some dumplings that are boiling on the stovetop.

Ryan looks around, trying to figure out who's calling his name, before he sees me waving. "Come here!" I call loudly.

He holds one finger in the air, telling me to wait as he finishes his conversation. Finally, after he stops to grab a plate of food, he makes his way over to me. "What's up?" he asks between bites of stuffed cabbage.

"Have you seen Katniss?" He shakes his head no and continues eating. "Can you go look for her?" I say, giving him a pleading look.

Ryan rolls his eyes and swallows his food before responding. "Why? I'm sure Delly's taking care of her."

"Uh, that's what I'm afraid of," I tell him. "If I know Delly, she probably scared Katniss onto the first flight back to DC." I start looking around me for someone who can take over my kitchen duties. There's got to be _someone_ else here who'll do it without complaining.

"How can I help?" he asks.

"Just grab her and give her a break from everyone. I'll try to get away from here soon and find you."

"Alright," he agrees, laughing. "But I'm sure she's doing just fine."

I shake my head as Ryan walks away. If I know Katniss at all, I seriously doubt that her mental state right now can be described as "fine." I just hope she's still here and hasn't run off. I hope she'll forgive me for subjecting her to this.

Just then I notice the water starting to boil over in the pot of dumplings that I'm supposed to be watching. I quickly try to stir it to bring the water back down, but I end up with a few drops of boiling water splashing and scalding my hand. Just then my aunt appears out of nowhere and turns off the burner. "Run over to the sink and put your hand in some water, Peeta," she advises me. "These look done anyway," she says, peering into the pot.

"Sorry about that," I apologize as I run my hand under the cold water.

She smiles and gives me a knowing look. "Got other things on your mind, I suppose. I've got this under control. Why don't you go find your girlfriend? I think I saw her downstairs."

"Are you sure?" I ask her, even as I start inching my way toward the basement steps. Ewa just laughs and waves me out of the kitchen.

I make my way down the stairs as quickly as I can, which is still really slow because I keep getting stopped by various family members who want to chat. It takes me a good fifteen minutes after leaving the kitchen, but soon enough I spot Katniss sitting in the corner with Ryan and Lydia. She looks absolutely shell-shocked – I can tell even from all the way across the room.

When I finally reach them, Katniss seems almost elated to see me, which is obviously a good thing, but I can tell that she's completely overwhelmed from the way she immediately plants herself in my lap and wraps her arms around my neck. As nice as it is to have her in my arms, I know this isn't something she would normally do, and especially not in public. And as a matter of fact, she doesn't let go of me again for the rest of the evening – when she's not in my lap, she either has a tight grip on my hand or waist. Everyone thinks it's just beautiful how much we clearly _adore_ each other. I wish that were the case. At this point, all I can hope is that bringing her here didn't cause any more damage to our already-fragile relationship. But only Katniss can tell me that.

* * *

The morning after Katniss goes home, I decide to sleep in. This is rare for me, because after years of keeping baker's hours, my body is practically programmed to wake up early. But the weekend was mentally exhausting (I spent a lot of time trying to figure out what I wanted to say to Katniss, even though I never actually said it) and I don't have to work today, so I'm allowing myself the rare treat of sleeping in.

Or trying to sleep in, at least. I've been lying in bed for over an hour with my eyes closed, attempting to will myself to fall back to sleep. It's not working. My mind keeps going over the details of my weekend with Katniss, and the things I wish I'd said to her. I'm about to get out of bed when I hear my phone ring on the table next to me. My eyes widen when I see who it is –Prim.

"Hi Prim," I answer nervously. Why is she calling? It's got to be about Katniss. Is something wrong?

She doesn't greet me in return. "How was your weekend?" she asks bluntly. Her voice doesn't betray any emotion.

I'm confused. Why is she asking me this? "Um…did you talk to your sister?"

"Yeah. But I want to hear from you. How was the visit?"

Biting my lip, I stammer out an answer to her. I never knew Prim could be so intimidating. "It was…fine. Good? We enjoyed seeing each other."

"Did she tell you how she felt about meeting your family?"

"No…well, I think she said it was fine? I take it that's not the case," I say hesitantly.

I hear Prim huff loudly in frustration on the other end of the phone. "You guessed correctly," she responds sarcastically.

Running my free hand through my hair, I tell her, "Listen, I'm sorry, it's just that Katniss wanted to visit this weekend and we had this family party and – "

She cuts me off abruptly. "I don't blame you, Peeta. Katniss can't avoid your family forever. I just wanted to know what she told you, which was apparently nothing." She takes a deep breath before she continues. "Do you and Katniss ever talk to each other, or do you spend every free minute in bed?"

I'm momentarily speechless. "Uhh…"

Thankfully it doesn't seem like she's actually waiting for me to answer her question. She barrels forward. "Listen, Peeta, I really like you and I think you're good for my sister. But you guys are _this close_ to breaking up, do you realize that? There are too many problems for me to get into right now, and I probably shouldn't be talking about them anyway. But if you two can't talk to each other, it's all going to be over."

"God, Prim," I start, trying to figure out the best way to respond. Shaking my head, I continue, "Katniss doesn't like talking about anything. And I hate to push her."

"Peeta. Please listen to me," she says forcefully. "You know Katniss. She is never going to start that conversation. Accept it – _you_ have to do it. That's why I'm calling you. _You_ have to do this."

Does Prim really think I don't know that? I've been over these scenarios in my head a million times. Obviously, I've never seen the benefit to starting the conversation. I attempt to explain myself to Prim. "Won't talking to her just scare her away? You keep saying that we're about to break up, but won't she run off if I try to talk to her too? That's why I don't do it."

Prim sounds almost angry when she responds. I've never seen her like this before. "You two drive me crazy!" she exclaims. "I'm telling you this to try to help you, but obviously you don't have to do anything you don't want to. You can just let your relationship with Katniss die a natural death, if that's what you want. I thought you might be rational enough to listen to me – god knows Katniss won't."

She falls silent on the other end of the phone. Clearly she's waiting for me to respond, but I hardly know what to say. What a way to start my day. "I…uh…Prim, I just need some time to think about this," I answer truthfully. I don't think it's what she wants to hear.

Prim sighs. "Fine, Peeta. Listen, I've got to go. I think I've interfered enough for one day," she says ruefully.

"No, it's alright," I say slowly. "I promise…I'll try to figure something out."

"Bye Peeta."

I collapse back onto my bed after my call with Prim ends. She gave me a lot to think about. What if she's right about me and Katniss? Are things really as bad as she says? I thought I had a little more time…

If there's one thing I'm certain about though, it's that I want to save my relationship with Katniss. I love her. Did I really bring myself this close to the brink of losing her? But what do I do? Prim's approach – I think she wants me to confront Katniss and just lay everything out there – doesn't feel right to me. It seems like it would push us closer to breaking up, not closer to working things out.

But Prim is Katniss's sister – she knows her better than anyone. I shouldn't completely discount what she says. And she made it clear that I need to do something soon…I can take that part seriously at least. But how can I act quickly when I don't even know where to begin?


End file.
